A Christian since birth.

Everybody knows one, or maybe you are one! Someone who has always feared the Lord, avoided things which are questionable, and has rarely (if ever) doubted God in their lives. Some may call these Christians 'sheltered' or naive....some even become jealous of their perceived innocence. Myself included.

As I looked over the mistakes in my life and the bad choices I had made, I couldn't help but feel that things would have been different if only I had known for sure God existed back then. Maybe I wouldn't have as heavy a burden to deal with if I had known the price I would have to pay with guilt and shame.

I had two friends from Church while I was growing up, who seemingly had done things just right. They seemed so drawn to Christ and on fire for our Lord and Saviour. I was jealous of the joy they displayed, and the confidence with which they spoke of Jesus being in their lives. I convinced myself that their lives were much better than my own because they obeyed Jesus' teachings their whole lives.

This became a stumbling block for me as I continued to seek God's presence. Just as I began to draw near to Him, reminders of how inadequate I was would have me retreating back into the shadows and away from His embrace. Oh how I longed to go back and change things so that I wouldn't have to face the pain of seeing who I really am!

The Lord kept pursuing me.

When I finally opened my heart and my life to Christ, He showed me how I was loved even though I am a sinner; that my reward in Heaven was not based on how I lived my life before accepting Christ, it was determined by how I lived with Christ! I basked in His Peace and was experiencing True Joy for the first time in my life!

There remain people who struggle with my past mistakes and seem perplexed at how the Lord could just wipe my slate clean after the things I have done. These same people have done everything right, according to their understanding of God's teachings. Where I used to be jealous of their seemingly light burdens, I now see it as their own stumbling block.

Mark 2:17 (King James Version)

When Jesus heard it, he saith unto them, "They that are whole have no need of the physician, but they that are sick: I came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance."

Because I have been forgiven much, I am constantly reminded how to love others with Christ's freely given love. Where some may question the actions of my past, there is not one who will question the love Christ has shown in my life. He does not punish those who seek His face, He forgives and replenishes their strength to go into the world and profess the miracle that has been performed in their life.