Saturday, January 30, 2010

Puppy love


God works in mysterious ways. I have been adamant for the last 10 years that my home will not be occupied by any large animals. I guess God figured I was being a bit too stubborn...and I realize that He was right--again.

Kipper ('Kip' for short) was adopted on January 25 from our local Humane Society. She has already found a lasting place in all of our hearts...and I am grateful for the way she is helping Alec to heal from some of his hurts.

God could not have picked a better behaved puppy for us to love on! She came to us almost fully house-trained, and has the most gentle demeanor I've ever seen in a dog!

At 3.5 months old, she is already nearing 25 pounds....I have a feeling she is not going to be a lap dog when full-grown.

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Moving along...


The thing about not writing on my blog very often is that it may give off the impression that I remain feeling as conflicted as my last post indicated.

Which is not the case.

Well, at least I'm not feeling like that all the time....just when the feelings well up inside.

Which they tend to do while I work out my emotions.

And they are working themselves out. In their own time.

Meanwhile, I have an almost-eight-year-old daughter and an almost-four-year-old daughter who are completely and totally addicted to card games. I don't say that lightly. They literally go through withdrawal if they cannot find someone to play 'Go Fish' with them when the mood strikes.

And the mood strikes often.

I made absolutely no New Year's resolutions.....which means that I've already accomplished what I set out to do for 2010: live each day, one moment at a time. Pretty good, huh?

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

God is always right

I've been struggling with some very real emotions recently. Emotions that make me want to say hurtful things.

In the world's eyes, I'm justified. In fact, in my eyes, I'm justified in carrying out what my emotions want me to do.

However, in God's eyes, I am not excused if I carry out these actions in anger.

As much as I pray that the Lord lifts my hurt and anger, a huge part of me wants to hang onto it. I don't want to forgive this person. I want this person to hurt inside. I want this person to pay for what they have done. I want revenge.

What I have been learning (albeit slowly) is that having God in my life does not make decisions fact, I'd say that His guidance makes the choices so much more difficult! Yes, that's right. I said it. It's hard having God in my life right now.

Why? Because I cannot deny the Truth of His counsel. I want to react with my human instincts. Before I knew God, I would do just that. I didn't really care if I hurt people along the way....because I felt justified in doing so.

Now that I do know God through Jesus, I am privy to know the 'right thing' to do....and it's so hard to choose the right thing when every part of my being wants to do the wrong thing.

My human urge wants to deny knowing what is right. I have been close to giving in to these hurts...and every time I get near acting them out, I see the cross before me. I have a choice to add another nail or put the hammer down.

I am stuck holding the hammer right now. In tears. I think I know what I will do, but I have not made that decision yet.

God is always right.